Dang, hell of an update... But I have a question, you said round 9 will be the final build. Do you mean the final build for the public demo or like this is the end of the story?
Valisie
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*spoilers
Is it weird that despite the MC's pov I have found nothing that Marrowyn has said or done to be creepy or unexpected?
Maybe I'm just bias for Marrowyn because I'm not so secretly hoping the MC accidentally gets a little bit smooshed by his belly while they are in an elevator or something! Eheheh...
Specifics? Oh no! The exact follow up question I feared when I made my comment!
Well, here goes! Deep breath!
Spoilers
First the reader is presented with two possible outcomes, both are super bad for someone if not every one. With no quarter given to the “there must be some other way” train of thought the story has a kind of “if you’re expecting a happy ending you’re not paying attention” sorta vibe.
All the themes you warned of such as substance use, mental health issues, extreme trauma, suicidal/homicidal thoughts and the very idea of people that are afflicted by such holding the fate of every one else in their hands. (Mainly because that’s real life where I live.)
Next comes the idea of unending nose and ear bleeds! The tunnel, all the blood, vomit and such, I simply found text descriptions of these things to be more disturbing than VNs that rely on visual cues to portray this because my imagination does so much worse to me with descriptive words.
Lastly… Reuben! So much with this one alone! Innards! Licking said innards! The copious amount of times he said “and again” in the second bed time story! The first bedtime story! but mostly some of the views he expressed such as hostility towards an entire group of people despite many of those people must have been grown well after the events that he is resentful for. Also I feel specifically called out by a comment he made about docile people since that’s my natural disposition as a person.
Well that about wraps it up, and again I must emphasize that none of this is meant as criticism, with out such elements it would be difficult to write such a compelling story.
Ps. I like the way Neo is drawn and I hope to see more artwork of him beside the other characters. I know this might be difficult because the story is meant to be seen through his eyes so here is to me hoping for a mirror scene in the future!
This VN is not the first to make me feel uncomfortable, but has 100% made me feel the most uncomfortable of any VN to date! That's saying a lot considering the others had much more gore jump scares and general ickyness!
Please understand I don't mean any of this in a negative way, and I feel as though the author is expecting such reactions.
In this VN a compelling story has been created, and I'll fight through those queasy feelings to continue reading new chapters.
Thank you for sharing your works Kideshi.
Rapid Fire Updates for November! (Build 4, New Character Tease, & More) comments · Posted in Rapid Fire Updates for November! (Build 4, New Character Tease, & More) comments
You defeat your own argument when you say "there's no culture or anyplace where you'd be glad unless you've been indoctrinated" You're pointing out the very means by which that can and does happen, but I won't dwell on that.
Slavery is evil, but trying to pretend there are no cultures that had it as a cornerstone of their society is foolish. Ever heard of Rome?
Not putting up any resistance to those that are more powerful than you is quite common literally every where. Do you pull over for the police? Are you cordial with police when they pull you over for no reason? Have you ever heard of civil asset forfeiture? These are things that exist in your world. They are not unbelievable or immersion breaking.
I'm not making a moral judgement about how things should be, simply pointing out how things actually are for the majority of people.
Lastly, if you work for a living surely you understand that if you are not productive you will be cut off from a revenue stream yes? You're aware of what happens when someone has no income yes? This is what I meant by be productive or die being a reality for most people. Be productive or die also transcends being a fact of all human civilization to being a fundamental law of nature for all living things in the world.
Sorry I had to amend this to ask, what do you mean when you say? "You can't really claim it's a difference of culture and you can't claim slavery is tied to culture."
The definition of culture is "the customs, arts, social institutions, and achievements of a particular nation, people, or other social group."
See how it says social institutions? Slavery is a social institution.
I'm so embarrassed to be asking this, I understand if it's a question you decline to answer, but here goes anyway...
Any chance of a submissive love interest wanting the MC to sit on them?
A specific example would be a partner laying down on a couch to watch a movie together and MC choosing where on top of them to sit.
Allow me to offer some words of encouragement, just like how there are no more unexplored lands left on earth there are no more untold stories due to the many millennia of the written word.
All stories can be divided into three groups Man vs Man, Man vs Nature, Man vs Myth.
There is no shame in your story being similar to someone else's so long as it came from your heart, do not be ashamed to tell your story just because others exist.
After all, would you refuse to go see the grand canyon for yourself just because someone else has already seen it?
Helward: A Tanuki Story (0.2.0) comments · Replied to dash in Helward: A Tanuki Story (0.2.0) comments
In your story I love what I've read so far, how ever reading this and the last Dev log gives me the impression that you're trying to justify the choices you've made to yourself. You really don't need to justify it to us because your story has been great so far and what you write next will be just as awesome I'm sure! Don't stress over this, you're good, really!
Violet Memoir Dev Log! VERY IMPORTANT! comments · Posted in Violet Memoir Dev Log! VERY IMPORTANT! comments